It is post child bedtime as I sit here writing this post, to the right of me sits a rather large glass of red wine, which if I’m honest I have been looking forward to since about 3.30 this afternoon. If I’m going to be really honest I would say that this is typical of most days. Ok so being even more truthful on some days I have sat at the dinner table gripping a large glass of wine in an effort to protect my sanity amidst a situation similar to feeding time at the zoo. The remainder of the bottle usually sits patiently on the side, waiting for the children to go bed so we can have some alone time.
The wine has always been there for me, especially after a few very bad days. Bad days are usually defined by the level of shittyness that the children reach which results in the loosing of ones shit. At the end of these kinds of days I am left with a hundred pounds of guilt on my shoulders for letting shouty mummy take over and I dissect every bit of parenting, convincing myself that I should have done better. One glass of the old vino and the inner critic leaves, my head clears and my shoulders return to their usual anatomical position. There definitely appears to be a direct correlation between the amount of wine consumed and the type of day that I have had. Tantrums and usual threenager stuff would probably mean one glass. Worse case scenario or ‘1 bottle days’, have been caused by multiple tantrums, poo, pee and milk on the floor and a double hit of conjunctivitis.
As much I joke about my fondness for the vino and whether the day has been a one or two glass of wine kind of day, I’m starting to think that maybe it’s not that funny anymore and maybe has a slightly sinister undertone to it all. If you think about it, counting down to wine o’clock, constantly debating an acceptable wine o’clock time and the emergency ‘BRING WINE HOME’ texts to the other half, is probably not the best. Can I really not get through a day of mothering without the comfort of the vino waiting for me at the end of the day?
Of course I can, not every day is a vino dependant day. I don’t hit the vino everyday and I’m not hiding bottles in the laundry basket just yet. But when I go into the weekend it’s as if something clicks in my head where I believe I have the alcohol consumption powers of my 18-year-old self (although am not shimmying around a nightclub, I am horizontal on the sofa) with the ability to waft through a hangover. I seem to forget that I am now unable to stay in bed eating a dominoes and watching Friends (oh how I miss those days). I forget that I cannot throw a sickie because my employers do not allow me too; my three little bosses need me to be at the top of my game. Being a mum of three Pre-Schoolers is exhausting at the best of times, add in a foggy head due to a couple of vino’s the night before and its a recipe for disaster. In reality just one glass of wine knocks me about these days and seems to leave me with a mild hangover (a bit tired and grumpy with a small pizza craving). So I think its time to come to terms with the fact that I am now just shit at drinking and me and the vino need to take a break.
A little bit easier said than done as I really do love the wine and is often the only thing that seems to help me unwind and re-connect with my sanity after a toddler, threenager(s) combo attack. But it appears to have become habitual and I am in some sort of cycle; the vicious wine cycle where the children reach a wine inducing level of shittiness, shouty mummy appears then guilty mummy runs straight for the comfort of the vino. The foggy head of the next day only makes grumpy mummy come out and it makes the day with the kids less enjoyable *. Shouty mummy and grumpy mummy often visit the house, but to limit the chance of them making an appearance I need to be parenting on a full tank, not under the influence of a couple of vinos from the night before. So its time to try to break the cycle and look for other things to find comfort in at the end of the day.
I’ll have a go at least, but I imagine me and the vino will hook up every now and then.
*Not enjoyable per se, I mean its more manageable, as in the whining squabbling and tantrums don’t seem to shatter the brain into a hundred pieces. I can get through a play doh session or pop-up-pirate without loosing my shit.
Threesypeasy 
Don’t be too hard on yourself! I think every mother goes through the Vino stage!! I’d rather do the Hot Bath (hopefully a silent one, without one of the 4 yelling for something, and probably with a glass of wine) 😂 than the chamomile tea!!! X
LikeLiked by 1 person
Bath and wine, love that combo….with a lavender candle also!! Always someone trying to come in and have a poo though…relaxation is just impossible x I don’t think I’m gonna be able to say goodbye just yet, just trying to limit it x chamomile tea is a poor substitute
LikeLiked by 1 person
haha! I’m at preteen and teen stage and the vino is still my best friend! lol to be fair (it) I don’t find out that vino could help my bad parenting days until about 4 years ago, but its been a wonderful 4 years haha!! I defo have a glass most days (so bad) BUT its also because mine are preteen and teen.. the husband and I are more frequently finding ourselves alone and this new found ‘just us’ time has made us a bit ‘wild’ …”glass of wine while we cook together love?” (as we head back 15 years) says the husband.. me: “oooh yea go on then” *twinkle in eye” – too much info I know lol, but i’m trying to defend my/our wine consumption these days 😉 I think the bottom line is, no matter what stage of parenting, there is ALWAYS a good reason to have wine! great post!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh the teens….I am soooo gonna need the wine to get me through. we’re not quite at the just us time yet we normally pass the bottle then pass out *so tired* it will be nice to have a pleasant drink rather than a drink to forget the hideousness of the day. I’m doing shit at giving it up, currently on second glass .oops x thanks for reading x
LikeLike
I was having this conversation earlier, I too possibly need to curb my relationship with the vino. It’s just the children can be so *horrible* and wine is always your friend. Sad times. If water tasted as good we’d all be healthier! Thanks for popping along to #chucklemums!
LikeLiked by 1 person
What else is there that can provide the comfort like the vino? I am gonna try and find out but so far am doing a shit job *sips second glass of red* doh x
LikeLike
Don’t be hard on yourself we all have vino days – I think you are a hero having three such little ones!!! It is hard parenting on a hangover though, I can’t really do it! Maybe cake can be an alternative?! #chucklemums
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mmm cake. Cake could definitely be my new BFF. Hangovers with kids are just hideous and I just cant take it like I used to. Not doing the best so far though …. bottle consumed so far this week. oops xx Thanks for stopping by
LikeLike
I think it’s perfectly acceptable to have a visit with Mr Bottle every so often!!! It’s my winewaist I worry about…..stupid lard. #chucklemums
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha the wine waist …. myself and Mr bottle are currently having our ‘weekly’ get together (just can’t let go) x Thanks for your comment x
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have just undergone a 2 week detox following a particularly bingey weekend of booze, food and er, well that’s it actually.
Being a Mum at home there is no point where you ‘get home from work’ so kids in bed, wine allowed can easily become a substitute for the same effect can’t it! I wouldn’t beat yourself up too much, as long as you aren’t popping the Merlot in a travel mug on the school run I’m sure you’ll be fine. A little detox might be just what you need to feel a bit better about the habits you’ve created though. Good luck!
Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub x
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s a really good point .. no getting home from work, it’s like you’re clocking off when the wine gets opened. I like that ‘merlot in the benchmark
LikeLike
It’s the only job a person can have when you never ‘clock off’. The wine allows you to have an hour to yourself, letting your mind believe, just for that moment, you have finished work.
LikeLike
Aargh sent too early was gonna say will have that ‘wine in the travel mug’ benchmark in mind – I’m ok if I don’t hit that point. Love it x thanks for your comment x
LikeLike
I remember all throughout the twos every day was a wine day with the count down to wine o clock, but now we’re almost at threes, wine o clock and I are friends, but not on a daily basis. Looking forward to hearing how your new friendship goes! Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub lovely x
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mmm I’m not sure I’m going to be able to let go….It’s just too hard. We”ll always need each other just trying to makesure it’s weekly more than daily 😉 thanks for your comment xx
LikeLike
I love that your chamomile tea is cold and in an Iron Man beaker (mine’s a Thomas sippy cup). I am exactly the same – wine o’clock can’t come soon enough most days, which is slightly worrying but hey – whatever gets us through I reckon, within reason! 🙂 #Coolmumclub
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha we all have a cupboard full of plastic characterised cups i’m struggling to find an alternative, apart from cake but then that just makes my ass massive … It’s the lesser of two evils x thanks for your comment
LikeLike
I have a (just) three year old, a (nearly) two year old and a 10 week old and more often than not finish the day with a glass (ahem or two) of vino. Mainly due to the threenagers teatime/bedtime behaviour. I start each week promising myself to be better but it gets to Thursday and the weekend starts!!! Think we all deserve it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I here you! So the the same on the ‘Thursday is the start of the weekend wine’ it’s a good week for me if I can get to Thursday and its my first drink of the week 😩 thanks for your comment. (Three under three is just chaos isn’t it xxx)
LikeLike
wine and choc are most defo the answer….3 under school age…you deserve a medal…some days are just so hard xxx #fridayfrolics
LikeLiked by 1 person
I just don’t think there’s much else that does the trick like a vino and a double decker. I think I need my head examining rather than a medal x 😜thanks for your comment
LikeLike
Oh lord I have sent the “BRING WINE’ text many a time. I did take a break from it and actually lost quite a bit of weight. Thank you for sharing making me laugh. #FridayFrolics
LikeLiked by 1 person
I defo know I will loose a bit of the ass if I go off it for a bit – it’s just sooo nice at the end of the day. Maybe a nice cuppa instead xx thanks for your comment
LikeLiked by 1 person
My blog name is thirstydaddy. I’m more of a bourbon drinker, but I think I can relate…#fridayfrolics
LikeLiked by 1 person
My blog name is thirstydaddy. I’m more of a bourbon drinker, but I think i can relate….
LikeLike
Love the blog name ….. not s fan of the bourbon but we all have a favourite tipple. Thanks for reading
LikeLike
The thing is wine does take the edge off – I don’t know where I’d be without it!! #fridayfrolics
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know and struggling to find something that does the same – I’m gonna miss it! Thanks for reading x
LikeLike
There is something so very comforting knowing there is a bottle of wine in the fridge. I’ve found a lovely non-alcoholic rose which I drink during the week. Tastes like wine but without the hangover. I am so rock n roll! Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics
LikeLike
Fantastic post! As a father of 4 I can tell you that it’s a game of attrition. You just have to wait it out. We have all 4 out of the house now and …we moved to Napa Valley where there are 500 wineries to get to know. Check out our wine country blog: http://www.topochinesvino.com
LikeLike
Wow, 500 wineries! There’s no way i’d manage to stay off the vino if I lived in the Napa Valley. Glad you liked it much appreciated x Will pop over and have a look at your website to see if I can get some tips on wines appropriate after a day of mothering!
LikeLiked by 1 person