Being ‘Mum Ill’

Illness struck the other week. One by one we fell to a dreaded sickness  bug. It hit us, quite literally, at the crapiest of times – like in the middle of the night. For most of the ‘ill’ week  we found ourselves with a sick child sandwiched between us in bed. With one hand on a sick bowl, we spent most of the night poised ready to take a blow. There was very little sleep had, so as you can imagine the mood of the house was not at its best.

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Half-Term in a picture

Last week was the half-term break for us. It has been quite hectic getting the big girl settled into big school so I was looking forward to having a week off from the school run and a bit of down time.  How did that go I hear you ask?

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Our Half-Term Journal

So last week was half term for us. After a hectic first term at big school, I was looking forward to not having to do the school run and generally just knobbing about in our pj’s. Everyone was evil tired and well and truly in need of some down time. I didn’t have anything planned, apart from a little something for school girls birthday. We were just going to chill, have a play and some general together time. Lovely. As part of the big girls ‘Home Learning’ she needed to put together a journal of all the things she had done over the break, so this is what she produced; with some supporting commentary from mummy.

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Stating the obvious – just knob off!

The saying goes…’If you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all’.

So true – for obvious reasons.

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Parenting; International common ground 

We’ve always loved a holiday and experiencing life on different shores. Whenever we could and to wherever we could, we would get away. To remote corners of Scotland to sunny beaches of Spain and peaceful villages in the Caribbean (I sound like a twat here I know, but fuck it we he worked hard for it). We were kid free and life was, well it was quite simply flipping marvellous.

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Childbirth; A family event?

Jamie Oliver and his wife Jools sparked off quite a few discussions this week with the birth of their fifth child. It wasn’t anything to do with the name they have chosen, which hasn’t been announced yet but I imagine it will be a little ‘out there’, but more to do with the fact that their two eldest daughters were present at the final moments when Jools popped him out, even mucking in a little and cutting the cord.

For me, the idea of this sent a shiver down my spine, possibly due to the fact that I instantly imagined how the situation would transpire in our family.

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When Parenting Karma Bites you in the Ass

A strange thing happened the other week, whilst on holiday. It was an unusual moment, which rarely hardly ever happens. I can’t remember the last time this happened at home, let alone  being able to experience it abroad. It was a joyful moment where I wasn’t quite sure if I was conscious and perhaps dead maybe, off somewhere in parenting heaven. So what was this divine moment I hear you ask. Well it was quite simply;


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Big school is just around the corner.

So its happening lady. Its fast approaching. Its imminent. You will very soon be at big school. You’re growing up.                                                             

It only seems like five minutes ago that you came into the world. I can remember it like it was yesterday,  the pain (oh god the pain) and then the overwhelming  feeling of joy when you were handed to me all slimy and squishy. You seemed so delicate, I was terrified I would break you, I didn’t have a clue. I never realised how overwhelming becoming a mum would be or how intense keeping you safe would feel.Very soon you will be setting off on a journey which will take you off into the big wide world (possibly not Europe as we may be told to knob off,  will explain that one to you one day – but there’s more world outside Europe) and I will miss these days where I could keep you here with me all safe and sound.

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Threesy does getting the kids to drink water

Having now weaned three children, I’d like to think that it makes me slightly competent enough to offer some advice on the subject. I wouldn’t say I’m an Annabel-Karmel-home-made-burger-faces with-spaghetti-hair kind of expert but I am quite far from the novice holy-fuck-how-do-I-purée-a-carrot stage (don’t roll your eyes as surviving on -15 hours sleep makes a simple task like this quite a brainteaser).

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Mothering Under the Influence

It is post child bedtime as I sit here writing this post, to the right of me sits a rather large glass of red wine, which if I’m honest I have been looking forward to since about 3.30 this afternoon. If I’m going to be really honest I would say that this is typical of most days. Ok so being even more truthful on some days I have sat at the dinner table gripping a large glass of wine in an effort to protect my sanity amidst a situation similar to feeding time at the zoo. The remainder of the bottle usually sits patiently on the side, waiting for the children to go bed so we can have some alone time.

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